Little Known Facts
There are so many unshared things about parenting that might be helpful when you are thinking about becoming a parent.So off come the gloves, watch out world, I'm spilling the beans! I'm sharing FACTS! Mamas, I'm here for you.This post will focus on baby's first month as Baby Groot is one month old (already!).Let me tell you- this has been the fastest month ever.
Three Little Known Facts About Baby's First Month
Baby's Gonna Sleep, Kind Of.
Babies sleep 20-22 hours out of EACH DAY the first few weeks they're home. In fact, the first three months after the baby arrives are sometimes referred to as the "4th Trimester," what a misnomer, right? Baby is adjusting to being outside of the womb- the sights smells and sounds of the world especially. As such, he is probably going to do a fair amount of sleeping- but I don't want to get your hopes up. Those sleeping bouts are usually in 20-40 minute increments at times due to a baby's sleep and REM cycles. It may be good to mention that though they say "sleep when the baby sleeps" that may be easier said than done. You might want to take a few moments to shower or eat during these times- as you should. AND even if baby is sleeping- if you're a bit neurotic like me- you'll be waking every so often in the beginning just to make sure they're breathing. Yes. This is a thing. I'm happy to say I'm not the only mom that does this. My obsession is linked to too many late night google sessions and warning stories. So though you may be sleeping, it might not always be restful sleep. As your baby gets older, they'll start stretching out their waking times. This does not mean that you should be keeping them awake when they want to sleep. Weirdly, sleep begets sleep. Babies who sleep well during the day tend to sleep better at night. So, let baby sleep (unless they're in danger of missing a feeding early on). Then, cross your fingers that they sleep at night.
Visitors are exhausting
Everyone wants to meet your little bundle, and you're excited to show him off. Who wouldn't be? You, literally, made him! Most people come over with the intention of being "helpful," but the truth of the matter is that a) they don't know exactly what you need unless you tell them and b) they really just want an opportunity to hold the little bean. (Can you blame them?) As such, this means that you may not feel comfortable going to lay down, or fully resting when people come to visit- even if you're given the opportunity. You probably won't have much interaction with adults during your days home so the conversation may be welcome as well.
What you can do:
Don't be afraid to say "no" to someone if you're not physically or mentally prepared for a visit. It's already going to be exhausting to your emotions or your nerves (remember, your body is going nuts inside already) so if you're feeling a bit overwhelmed and would rather rest without company, it's your right to say so. If a visitor comes over with the intent of providing assistance, set them up to succeed. Put a list of chores or to-do items on the fridge. This could include helping with laundry, running a quick vacuum in the main living area or wiping down counters while you nurse. Pick things that you're comfortable having people assist with so that you can relieve yourself of some stress and manual labor which you shouldn't-be-doing-anyway-the first-few-weeks during their visit. Not everyone will want to help, but if they offer put 'em to work! *Full Disclosure* I had every intention of doing this with each of my three kiddos and it never happened for me. I didn't make a list nor did I request the help- but I probably should have. My own guilt-issues got in the way, here.
We're All Wingin' It
There are a myriad of sites, books, videos and blogs that include "best practices" for child-rearing. The secret is that we're ALL wingin' in. What works for your first child may not work for your second or even your third! Go figure, right? What worked for your mom or your grandmother may not work for you, nor may it be considered safe these days.You may be able to figure out a schedule for your little one, or they may be complete chaos for a bit. You're doing it right.Baby might gain all their weight back in 4 days, or it might take them a week. You're doing it right.You might shower every day after baby arrives, or you may invest in dry shampoo. You're doing it right.What they don't tell you is that apart from proper feeding, changing, and doctor visits everything else is really just a suggestion. The bottom line is, if your child is eating, sleeping and pooping- you're doing it right.So we're a month in. We're exhausted, and Groot is growing.Hopefully, we're doing it right.Be Great,M